so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
