in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
