In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
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