sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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