he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
