my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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