just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
