I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
