I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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