somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize