My room smells like vodka and shame
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Randomize