I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
