She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
