in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
