big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
We need to rekindle our bromance
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
