Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
