also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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