It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
