Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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