Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
