OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
