Whoa Z and x make the same sound
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
