New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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