Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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