Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize