As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
