So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
