Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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