so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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