nut hugger
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
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