On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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