Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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