bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
