But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
