Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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