So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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