I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
