The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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