He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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