i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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