hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
