I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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