I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm really into asian looking animals
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
i out mim tonsoeep
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