How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
we're making bets on your personal life
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
