Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
