Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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