he shaved USA in his pubs
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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