Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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