It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
as a side note pls kill me
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
