...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize