Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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