I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize
